WARDROBE MALFUNCTION
by Turretwithaview
Summary: This story has been sitting in my computer unfinished for some time. Set around Season 3, I finally managed to get it 'right' ... sort of. Hope you guys like it!


**WARDROBE MALFUNCTION**

She'd spent a month's wages on the stupid dress and when it got caught in the door ...

About the only thing Kate Beckett could be thankful for was the time of year. If you were going to get caught out in a situation like this at least summer was the time to do it!

Not that the time of year was uppermost in her mind right now. No siree, right now uppermost in her mind was how to get out of here without getting arrested for indecent exposure in front of half the world's paparazzi!

That, and how to avoid getting ripped to bits by the thorns of the bush she was hiding in. No, this was not a good day for one of New York's finest. In fact, if she could start the day over again she would probably begin by shooting Richard Fricking Castle, thus saving herself a month's salary, a frustrating day and a probably highly embarrassing International exposure in all senses of the word!

She had tried Lanie's number and it had gone to voicemail each time. She'd thought about calling Martha, but immediately discarded the idea with the realisation that Martha Rodgers was just as likely to unwittingly call the attention of the paparazzi, given her somewhat extravagant appearance. Alexis, the only really reliable Castle for this sort of situation was in College and would not be able to make it there in time.

So she was really only left with one choice ... and not the one she would have elected under normal circumstances ... to call Richard Castle. Duh! He was going to love this, and he was going to milk it for all it was worth. For a moment she really considered just heading for the pavement and hailing a cab ... it was the inevitability of Castle seeing her semi-naked picture spread across most of the major magazines, newspapers and tv screens that only just tipped the balance ... well that and the fact that she would never live it down at the precinct!

She could of course just try hiding here till darkness came, but she was bound to be spotted before then ... the smell of urine in the area marking this as a likely emergency stop for men in a rush. No she didn't really have an option. So she pulled his number up and dialled.

Because right now she was crouching behind a bush with her miniscule sequined clutch in hand and a getup not designed to go unobserved by la crème de la crème of the world's paparazzi standing on the opposite side of the street flashing (never more accurately applied) shots of the Mayor's Charity Ball.

"_Why, hello Detective Beckett, how nice t..._"

"_Castle! Shut up and listen!_" interrupted a thoroughly irate detective. "_I need you to do me a favour ... urgently!_"

"_Your wish is my command Detective, what can I do for you? And why are you whispering?_"

"_Whe ... where are you right now?_"

"_About to leave for the Mayor's Charity Bal … where I thought you were also supposed to be?_"

"_Well, yes I was ... am ... oh shit Castle just stop talking .. does your mother have a long coat I could borrow?_"

Silence

"_Castle?!_"

"_I thought you'd told me to stop talking?_"

"_Ahh! Castle just answer me!_"

"_Uh .. my mother, a long coat ... I expect so ... any particular colour?_"

"_Castle right now I couldn't care less about the colour! Just get me a coat and bring it will you ... quickly!_"

"_Uh sure, but Beckett ... where are you?_"

"_Look, just grab the coat and come to the Mayor's Ball. Call me as soon as you get here!_"

A thoroughly mystified Castle stood staring at the phone in his hand until with a start he realised that if he didn't get a move on he was likely to be dead ... shot through the head most likely, by one pissed-off Detective.

Heading upstairs he knocked on his mother's door and called out "_Mother! Are you decent?_"

"_I'm always decent Richard, come on in_"

"_Mother, I need to borrow a long coat ... for Beckett ... and don't ask me why, I haven't a clue!_"

"_Well dear, our tastes aren't exactly the same ... and she didn't request any particular colour? ... No? ... oh well, this green one will probably suit her best, here you are dear_"

With a kiss and a 'see you later', Castle bounded down the stairs, coat folded over his arm and headed down to the waiting town car. Ten minutes later, as his car slowed down and attached itself to the tail end of the procession of vehicles disgorging passengers at the entrance to the Ball he pulled out his phone and speed dialled his favourite Detective.

"_He_…"

"_Where are you Castle?!_" interrupted his very irate muse

"_Just pulled up at the tail-end of a very expensive line of cars … where are you?_"

"_Come and look for me over the other side of the street, near the corner! …. Oh, and Castle, please don't draw attention to yourself!_" with that the phone went dead and Castle's curiosity shot up another level. This was getting better and better!

Thanking his driver, he climbed out of the car, took a quick look around and seeing that most people seemed to be concentrating on the actress and her partner presently posing on the red carpet, he quickly crossed to the division, waited for a gap in the on-coming traffic and made it across to the other side.

Striding along the pavement he kept glancing around waiting for Beckett to make her appearance with whatever blood-stained or otherwise damaged-in-the-course-of-duty outfit she was wearing.

He was almost at the end of the street and beginning to feel worried about her non-appearance when a "_psst!_" drew his attention to a clump of bushes near the building's wall. Walking across the rather worn-down grass he came to a sudden standstill, mouth agape and eyes the size of saucers.

"_Castle! Stop staring! Close your eyes!_"

Slowly, with a beatific smile on his face he complied, closing his eyes and holding out his mother's coat unasked.

He felt the coat pulled from his hands and the rustling of it being pulled on. Eventually he slid open one eyelid and seeing the Detective pulling the belt tight around her waist allowed his other eye to open too, the smile still plastered across his face.

Eventually Beckett was ready, and standing tall she glared at him, a finger pointing right at the tip of his nose, "_If you tell anyone …. And I mean anyone … about this Castle, I will make sure your body is never found! Understood?_"

Still grinning from ear to ear he nodded and watched her stride away along the pavement, his tall, long-legged muse wearing the shocking green coat which clashed in all sorts of ways with her auburn hair, back held straight and proud disappearing down the street.

It was a pity she wouldn't be at the ball to make his evening more enjoyable, but the picture of his hot detective crouched behind the bush wearing nothing but a pair of silver stilettos and sandstone coloured Claudette Dessous bra and panties would remain with him till the end of his days!


End file.
